Friday, January 22, 2010

Nutritious food is very necessary for a pregnant woman






Nutritious food is very necessary for a pregnant woman. A pregnant woman requires 80 thousand extra calories in order to give birth to a healthy child because around 300 additional calories are spent everyday during pregnancy, which is equal to the amount of calories present in a glassful of low fat milk, a bread slice, and an apple.

Calcium rich food should be taken during pregnancy. Calcium prevents high blood pressure in a pregnant woman. A woman should drink two to three glasses of low fat milk during pregnancy. She should take it before, during pregnancy and after delivery.

Cook rice or barley in milk instead of water to get sufficient amount of calcium. Eat calcium rich things, as during pregnancy 1000 mg of calcium is required everyday.

The pregnant woman should avoid constipation and therefore she should drink more water, as it is also beneficial for the child growing inside the womb. Drink at least eight glasses of water during the day. Drink water before and after meals. Skimmed milk or fruit juice is also beneficial.

A pregnant woman also requires iron during these days. She should take protein rich food, dry beans, green peas etc. Iron is difficult to add in the food but it is very important. Eat iron rich food as much as possible. Cook vegetables in iron pans and take, iron tablets etc.

Avoid fish, and meat during pregnancy, as it could be harmful for the child. Reduce tea and coffee or completely avoid it as it reduces the weight of the child and leads to several other problems.

Different types of meat contain bacteria called hysteria, which could be dangerous for the health of the child growing inside the womb.

Fat is useful only when it is prepared from pasteurized milk. The child growing inside the womb depends on the food intake of its mother. Do not eat such foods which will have an adverse affect on the child's health in order to reduce the intake of carbohydrates. The child will not get sufficient nutrition. Eat green leafy vegetables and a variety of things during pregnancy to get all types of minerals and vitamins.


ANAEMIA DURING PREGNANCY:

The hemoglobin level reduces in the blood, and brings down the oxygen level in the body causing a lady to feel fatigued. In addition to this, she remains stressed, irritable, restless, emotional, angry, has dry skin, dry hair and loss of concentration. The main reason for anemia is the absence of sufficient nutritional elements in the food necessary for the formation of blood. Half a cup of rice has 0.5 mg of iron and one-cup of milk has 0.1 mg iron. Whereas a woman loses 28 mg iron everyday during menstruation.


FOOD DURING PREGNANCY:

A woman should choose pregnancy only when she is having good health. She should try to improve her digestive system. Take hot lemon water with honey, raw vegetables, especially carrot, cucumber, gourd, spinach, white gourd juice, vegetable juice, fruits, raisins, dry dates, vegetable soup. This improves the digestion process.

After conceiving food should be as follows:

Take lukewarm lemon water with honey or take a fruit or vegetable juice.

Take four to five almonds and 20 to 25 gm raisins, three to four dry dates along with milk and half a cup of fruit (apple and pear etc.) at 9 a.m

Take fruit juice or raw vegetable soup at noon.

Take lunch at 1.30 p.m, which should include chapatti made with whole wheat flour, salad, vegetable, curd (yoghurt), etc. Take salad in good quantity.

Take some fruit at 5 p.m or fruit juice or lukewarm lemon water with honey.

Take vegetable soup at 7.30 p.m.

Take lentils, vegetable, salad and one or two chapattis at 8 p.m or fruit and vegetable soup, and drink milk at bedtime. Take vegetable soup after a half hour of eating fruits.

Take something in between if hungry, like fruits, juice, etc.

Do not take tea or coffee, or take it only once daily.

A woman should not take food in excess but it should be rich in vitamins and minerals, and nutritious.


DAILY ROUTINE DURING PREGNANCY:

The woman should be careful during pregnancy, as there are chances of miscarriage. She should take regular massage for hands and legs since laborious work is not possible.

A pregnant woman should always be happy and avoid tough work. She should avoid fast walking, lifting weight, standing for long hours, climbing up the stairs, jumping, cycling, dancing, swimming, etc. she can do some light household work.


TO BEGET A HEALTHY CHILD:

The pregnant woman should take two oranges during afternoon from first to eighth month.

She should take half to one-gram linseed vanshlochan powder at bedtime for the first three to four months once she is tested positive for pregnancy. This helps in begetting a healthy child and also helps her remain strong. It also avoids chances of miscarriage. The lady should eat vanshlochan as much as possible with sugar candy and coconut. It overcomes weakness during pregnancy and keeps the child healthy and disease free.

The pregnant woman should chew aniseed daily after meals during the pregnancy.

She should drink 60 gm fresh grape juice twice daily to make the child healthy and strong. The child will be beautiful and the mother will remain free of faints, giddiness, dental pain, cramps, swelling, acidity and constipation. She should take one myrobalan marmalade everyday to beget a healthy child. It also maintains good health of the mother.


YOGIC CURE:

Regular exercise is necessary after conceiving. It prevents miscarriage and also reduces labour pain.

BEFORE PREGNANCY – Chakrasana, Paschimottasana, Yog Mudra, sputa Vajrasana, Shalabhasana, Dhanurasana, Hastpadotasana, Pavanmuktasana, Halasana, Sarvangasana, shalabhasana, Shavasana should be practiced to gain physical and mental health. Kapalbhati, Shitali, Nadi shodhan and Agnisar kriya should be practiced during this period.

AFTER PREGNANCY – A pregnant woman can do exercise up to three to four months after conceiving, which include Paschimottasana, Ardhamatysendrasana , Vajrasana, Suptavajrasana, Hastpadotasana, Makarasana, Halasana for special benefit. Stop the practice of these asanas after three months and do light household work.


 




Monday, January 4, 2010

Different type of kiss




Butterfly Kiss - With your faces less than a breath away, open and close your eyelids against your partners. If done correctly, the fluttering sensation will match the one in your heart.

Cheek Kiss - A friendly, "I really like you" kiss. Often the preferred kissing method of a first date. With your hands on your partner's shoulders, gently brush your lips across her cheek.

Earlobe Kiss - Gently sip and suck the earlobe. Avoid louder sucking noises as ears are sensitized noise detectors.

Eskimo Kiss - With your faces less than a breath apart, gently rub your noses together.

Eye Kiss - Hold your partner's head with both hands and slowly move their head in the direction you wish your kiss to go... then slowly kiss up towards your partner's eyes and give them a tender kiss on top of their closed eyes.

Eyelid Kiss - While your partner is resting/sleeping with eyes closed, very very gently kiss the spot right below their browbone. A very intimate kiss.

Finger Kiss - While laying together gently suck on their fingers. This can be very seductive and pleasurable.

Foot Kiss - An erotic and romantic gesture. It may tickle, but relax and enjoy it! To give a toe kiss by gently suck the toes and then lightly kissing the foot. It helps to gently massage the base of the foot while performing the kiss.

Forehead Kiss - The "motherly" kiss or "just friends" kiss. The forehead kiss can be a comforting kiss to anyone. Simply brush your lips lightly across the crown of their head.

Freeze Kiss (or Melt Kiss) - Experiment with this fun kiss. Put a small piece of ice in your mouth, then open mouth and kiss your partner, passing them the ice with your tongue. It's an erotic and sensual french kiss with a twist of cold.

French Kiss - The kiss involving the tongue. Some call this the "Soul Kiss" because the life and soul are thought to pass through the mouth's breath in the exchange across tongues. Surprisingly, the French call this "The English Kiss".

Fruity Kiss - Take a small piece of fruit and place between your lips (juicy fruits such as grapes, strawberries, small pieces of pineapple or mango are ideal). Kiss your partner and nibble one half of the piece of fruit while they nibble the other until it breaks in half, allowing the juice to run into your mouths.

Hand Kiss - Gently raise her hand to your lips. Lightly brush your lips across the top of her hand. Historically this kiss was performed with a bow, which showed deference to a lady.

Hickey Kiss - The object is not to draw blood, but to gently leave a mark that will prove your interlude was not a dream. This is often included in erotic foreplay.

Hostage Kiss - Cover your lips with tape and get your love's attention. When they come near, make noises like you're trying to tell them something and motion as if you can't get the tape off. Once they remove the tape from you to hear what you're trying to say tell them: "I've been saving my lips all day just for you!" Then kiss your love passionately!

Hot and Cold Kiss - Lick your partner's lips so that they're warm, and then gently blow on them. The sudden cold blast makes for a sensual explosion, and they will often try it on you next, as well as get very passionate.

Mistletoe Kiss - Surprise your lover by capturing them with a gentle holiday kiss under the mistletoe. This is also a good method for shyer individuals to steal a kiss from a potential lover.

Letter Kiss - Send your lover a kiss in a love letter by writing the letter x several times in a row at the bottom of a letter such as XXXXX.

Lick Kiss - Just before kissing, gently run your tongue along you partners lip whether it be the top or bottom one depending on the position of your lips. Very sensual.

Lip Sucking Kiss - When kissing gently suck on their lower lip. This can be very exciting.

Neck Nibble Kiss - Gently nibble up and down your partners neck. End with a gentle kiss on the lips.

Nip Kiss - This kiss can create a very erotic sensation. While kissing your partner, ever so gently nibble on their lips. You must be very careful not to bite to hard or hurt your partner. When done correctly, this kiss ignites wonderful sensations.

Reverse Lips Kiss - It involves standing above your lover and kissing them from over their head. This way, each kisser can take the hyper-sensitive bottom lip of thier lover in their mouths, and GENTLY draw blood to the surface of the lip by nibbling and sucking. A very sensuous, connecting kiss.

Searching The Cavern - Use the lips and tongue to gently tickle and kiss your lover's navel. Vary speeds and stroke to change sensation. Invigorating and intoxicating.

Shoulder Kiss - Simply come from behind, embrace her, and kiss the top of her shoulder. This is a sensual, loving kiss.

Sip Kiss - Take a small sip of your favorite drink. Leaving a little bit of it on your lips, kiss your partner. It is a unique way to create a sensual feeling and your partner will enjoy it.

Talking Kiss - Whisper sweet nothings into your partner's mouth. If caught in the act, simply say as Chico Marx, "I wasn't kissing her. I was whispering into her mouth."

Teaser Kiss - Starting on the forehead, a sweet short kiss on lips, then move up the arms up to her hand, kiss her hand, then come back up her arm, to her face and then lightly kiss her lips till she wants a passionate kiss.

The Buzzing Kiss - Gently place your lips against your lover's neck , behind their ear. Now, send a shudder through their skin by gently growling and humming, vibrating your lips and cheeks as you do so. Move up and down the neck, over the bones of the face and lips. Stimulating and erotic when done correctly.

The Whipped Cream Kiss - Dip your finger into some cool whip or whipped cream of your choice. Lick it off slowly, then embrace your partner and kiss them deeply letting their tongue slip over yours for a wonderfully sweet kiss. It's very seductive and passionate.

Tiger Kiss - Quietly sneak up behind your partner making sure they do not know what you are going to do. Out of the blue, grab them and gently bite their neck. Make sure to get a few good growls in too. This will surely surprise them.

Trickle Kiss - Take a sip of a favourite drink and trickle it slowly into partner's mouth while kissing.

Tongue Sucking - A variation of the French kiss. During an open-mouth kiss gently suck on your partner's tongue (not too hard because it may hurt). Very sexy :-)

Quickie Kiss - When you're in a rush. Often the nose gets it rather than the lips.

Vacuum Kiss - While kissing open-mouthed, slightly suck in as if you were sucking the air from your partners mouth. This is a playful kiss.

Wake Up Kiss - Before your partner awakes lean over and kiss their cheek and move over giving soft kisses until you reach their lips. Definitely a more than pleasant way to wake up!











Thursday, December 17, 2009

Choosing a Wife and Husband




Seeing that his mother was in a good mood, Ahmad sat near her and said, 'Mother, I have an idea which should bring you much joy." His mother answered eagerly, "My son, all that you give me makes me happy. What is on your mind?"

"You know," he told her, "I have finished my studies and can afford to begin a family. I have decided to marry."

His mother's face brightened with a smile. "This is very good news! I have long awaited such a day," she told him. "How often I have wished you would marry one of your cousins. Praise be to Allah that you have made this decision before it is too late!." Ahmad exclaimed, "Before it's too late? What do you mean?" "Your cousin Maryam is now old enough to marry. Every day there is someone visiting her home, seeking her hand."

Ahmad sat silently for a moment and said, "Then why should we bother her suitors?"

"What do you mean, Ahmad?," asked his mother, dismayed.

"My cousin Maryam is not fit for me."

"Why not? No, my son, you're mistaken. I shall go and see about your engagement tomorrow," his mother told him.

Ahmad frowned and said, "No, mother. Please do not do such a thing. I will not agree to this." "When she becomes your fiancé, you will feel love for her. Put aside your fears. Maryam is beautiful, and she has a respectable job."

Ahmad disagreed, "No. This matter only concerns me."

Ahmad's mother thought for a moment and said, "If you dislike Maryam, then there's my brother's daughter. She is as beautiful as Maryam, and she has inherited a large sum of money from my brother.

"Mother, please think about this matter from my point of view. I need someone to share my life, not a business partner."

His mother became angry and sharply asked, "What's wrong with my niece? Why isn't she good enough to be your wife?"

Ahmad replied, "She is not a practicing Muslim. I want a Muslim wife."

Ahmad's mother laughed sarcastically and said, "You speak as if you were an angel who could only marry another angel. Why don't you stop saying such nonsense, my son? You are an educated young man, you should give up your impossible ideals."

"I am neither an angel, nor do I seek a saint for a wife. I am a Muslim believer looking for a girl who also believes in Islam." replied Ahmad.

Ahmad's mother told him, "I don't know any girls who share your ideals."

He said, "I know someone who measures up to my expectations. "

Startled by this admission, Ahmad's mother asked, "You know someone? Who is she? Since when do you begin friendship with girls?"

Ahmad answered quickly, "I didn't mean that I know a girl personally, but I know of her." " I see," she said. "You have already chosen your wife. Who is this lucky girl?" "Mother, please be more understanding. I hope you will take my side and persuade father to agree with my choice."

This appeal to Ahmad's mother softened her, and she said, "I swear that I think only of your welfare. I'll help you. Tell me, what are this girl 's qualifications?"

Ahmad told her, "Nothing matters except the religious aspect. She is Muslim, and wears complete hijab." "Oh, then she is uneducated!" "No, she has a high school education and her religious knowledge is extensive."

Then his mother asked, "What family is she from? Do I know them?"

"She is from a good family known for their piety", Ahmad told her. "Of what use is a well-known family if a girl has no Islamic morals?" He silently beseeched Allah to give him the patience to overcome his mother's resistance. "A happy marriage doesn't depend on fame or wealth. Happiness stems from spiritual nearness and mutual understanding." Then, in a different tone of voice his mother asked,

"What does her father do for a living?" "He is a grocer," Ahmad replied.

"A grocer?!", she exclaimed. "Yes. He is a grocer and a very righteous man. He is the head of a happy and virtuous family."

Ahmad's mother interrupted him, "You are the son of a wealthy man; with your college degree you wish to marry a grocer's daughter? What a shame! Yet you ask me to assist you! If I had chosen the daughter of a jeweler, how would you feel?"

His mother replied, "There is a big difference between a jeweler and a grocer."

"The only difference is with regard to the substance. The former sells rings and the latter sells sugar. Both work in order to earn money," Ahmad answered.

His mother lamented, "Imagine your father's reaction to this news! "

Ahmad said firmly, " This is my desire, either you help me or I'll do it myself."

He spoke so seriously that his mother laughed mockingly, saying, "Does the matter require a great effort? The least move you make, they will give their daughter to you gladly."

Ahmad shook his head in doubt and said, "Wait and see!"

"What an odd situation this is! Am I to present my son to a grocer's daughter? What special beauty does this girl possess to make you blind to every other consideration?

"I have not yet seen her," Ahmad said.

"Then how do you know she's not ugly?" asked his mother.

"I know she is not. As far as good conduct is concerned, physical beauty is of little importance."

"Oh Ahmad, my amazement never ceases."

The next morning, Ahmad told his father of his intentions. His father became angry, but Ahmad remained determined to marry the woman of his choice. Finally his father agreed and Ahmad asked his mother to visit the girl's home to make the proposal and overcome any obstacles.

The following afternoon Ahmad's mother, accompanied by his oldest sister, went to the girl's house. On the way there, Ahmad's sister asked her mother what the girl's name was. Her mother replied, " I forgot to ask him! "When they knocked on the family's door, they were surprised to see a beautiful young girl open it. The girl was surprised to see the two unfamiliar women, but she showed them into the living room and went to tell her mother that they had visitors. Her mother welcomed the guests and waited for them to explain the reason for their visit. After exchanging greetings, Ahmad's mother asked who the young girl was who had opened the door. "It was my daughter, Zaynab," she replied. "Do you have any other daughter?" asked Ahmad's mother. "No, she's my only daughter", replied her mother. Ahmad's mother and sister were delighted to learn that the beautiful girl was Zaynab. Just then, Zaynab entered with coffee for their visitors. She sat next to Ahmad's sister and they soon found much to discuss. Then she collected the empty coffee cups and left the room.

Ahmad's mother began, "We have come with a blessed aim. We would be happy to have your daughter Zaynab as a wife for my son." She praised her son for his intelligence, his good looks and his wealth, but she neglected to mention his firm Islamic beliefs, which was very important to Zaynab's mother. Therefore, Ahmad's mother was stunned when Zaynab's mother shook her head slowly and said, "I'm very sorry. It is difficult for me to agree to this proposal; in fact, it's impossible." With much surprise, Ahmad's mother asked, "What is impossible?"

"My daughter is still young. I'm sure your son can find a girl who suits him." Ahmad's mother protested, "But Zaynab suits him well! Would you be kind enough to justify your refusal?"

"I only have one daughter, and I should be sure of her future married life."

"But Ahmad is well-off financially," said his mother. "He is an engineer!"

Zaynab's mother replied, "Zaynab would not marry someone because he is wealthy or has a college degree."

Ahmad's mother was at a loss for words. "Then what will ensure your daughter's happiness and consent?"

"When a mother looks for a wife for her son, she should mention her son's conduct." said the mother of Zaynab. "My daughter is a committed Muslim. She wants a Muslim husband, and remember, my daughter wears hijab, and your son may want a modern wife, who dresses like his mother and sister."

Ahmad's mother laughed with relief and told her, "You're correct. I haven't mentioned his conduct. I thought that other aspects of his character were of more importance. My son is a faithful Muslim. He is, in fact, looking for a wife who observes hijab. Be sure that my appearance (un-Islamic clothing) is not to Ahmad's taste."

Zaynab's mother also smiled and said, "You should have told me earlier! Please give us your address so we can visit you and learn more about your son."

"We hope you can come early next week," said Ahmad's mother.

Ahmad was waiting anxiously for his mother's return. As soon as she and her daughter returned home he asked, "Well, mother? How was your visit?"

"It was very strange," she replied.

"What was strange?", he asked. "Has anything bad happened?"

"Oh no, Ahmad. But I never expected such a thing," she answered. "Then they have refused?" Ahmad's father said, "How could a grocer's daughter refuse a wealthy young man?"

Ahmad's mother turned to her husband and said, " They did, in fact, refuse…"

"What! they refused?" asked the father. "I spoke about Ahmad's good qualities, but I didn't mention his Islamic morals. My appearance also caused her to decline my proposal because her daughter is a very faithful Muslim. When I realized their objections, I told them that you are a true Muslim as well. I have come to respect them very much. They don't care about status or wealth."

"Have you seen the girl?", asked Ahmad's father.

"Yes, she is lovely and polite. Ahmad is a lucky man to have made such a choice."

The following week, Zaynab's family paid a visit to Ahmad's home and plans were made for the upcoming wedding. They were soon married and there was much rejoicing.
 
 


--
Shabnam

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

SALTY COFFEE


He met her on a party. She was so outstanding, many guys chasing after her, while he was so normal, nobody paid attention to him. At the end of the party, he invited her to have coffee with him, she was surprised, but due to being polite, she promised. They sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything, she felt uncomfortable, she thought, please, let me go home.. Suddenly he asked the waiter:

"Would you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee."

Everybody stared at him, so strange! His face turned red, but, still, he put the salt in his coffee and drank it.

She asked him curiously: why you have this hobby?

He replied: "when I was a little boy, I was living near the sea, I liked playing in the sea, I could feel the taste of the sea, just like the taste of the salty coffee. Now every time I have the salty coffee, I always think of my childhood, think of my hometown, I miss my hometown so much, I miss my parents who are still living there".

While saying that tears filled his eyes. She was deeply touched.

That's his true feeling, from the bottom of his heart. A man who can tell out his homesickness, he must be a man who loves home, cares about home, has responsibility of home.. Then she also started to speak, spoke about her faraway hometown, her childhood, her family.

That was a really nice talk, also a beautiful beginning of their story. They continued to date. She found that actually he was a man who meets all her demands; he had tolerance, was kind hearted, warm, careful. He was such a good person but she almost missed him!

Thanks to his salty coffee! Then the story was just like every beautiful love story, the princess married to the prince, then they were living the happy life... And, every time she made coffee for him, she put some salt in the coffee, as she knew that's the way he liked it.

After 40 years, he passed away, left her a letter which said: "My dearest, please forgive me, forgive my whole life lie. This was the only lie I said to you---the salty coffee. Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous at that time, actually I wanted some sugar, but I said salt It was hard for me to change so I just went ahead.

I never thought that could be the start of our communication! I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life, but I was too afraid to do that, as I have promised not to lie to you for anything..

Now I'm dying, I afraid of nothing so I tell you the truth: I don't like the salty coffee, what a strange bad taste.. But I have had the salty coffee for my whole life! Since I knew you, I never feel sorry for anything I do for you. Having you with me is my biggest happiness for my whole life. If I can live for the second time, still want to know you and have you for my whole life, even though I have to drink the salty coffee again".

Her tears made the letter totally wet.

Someday, someone asked her: what's the taste of salty coffee? It's sweet. She replied.


**********

Love is not 2 forget but 2 forgive

Not 2 c but 2 understand

Not 2 hear but 2 listen

Not 2 let go but HOLD ON !!!!

**********

Friday, December 11, 2009

Overcoming internet addiction


 

Cyber obsession


Overcoming internet addiction


By Shahidul K K Shuvra


Cyber ignorant parents often misunderstand their children's overstaying with computer for surfing. They wrongly think spending time in the cyber space always educate them. Mother of Shohan Ahmed Porag, a student of class nine, spoke to The Independent with a happy simile. She said, my son knows every thing of computer from the age of nine. He solves internet related all the problems of us.
The Independent asked her what is the last result of her son in his school. She said with a disappointing tone that her son is not getting good marks in the exams. She guessed his school failed to judge merit of her son. 
Too much addiction to the internet is a threat to the natural development of surfers. Internet users have been increasing for the demand of Digital World. To sustain in the competitive world with receiving required knowledge every one needs cyber knowledge. However, instead of knowledge many surfers are spending time on the net for the addiction and obsessions.
Especially students are more vulnerable to the addiction which is taking away much of their time and energy. They are spoiling their study for overstaying at the fun sites.          
This corespondent of The Independent joined with the boy to surf the Net and found he is all the time chatting with yahoo messenger and clicking on facebook. Pathologically he has obsession to the cyber friends for fun and he likes to escape household chores.
Internet Addiction Disorder (IAD) rose from over surfing, abnormally browsing the Net like exchanging cyber dirty words and teasing, 'pathological computer use' and excessive gluing to PCs that hampers daily life. Ivan Goldberg proposed IAD in 1995 to describe the pathological problem.
Mother of Arif Hossain, 14 years old, alleged his son is sleeping at late night and he can't attend his school at right time. He is tirelessly attached to the computer screen. He was not that before internet coming in home. He is suspected patient of IAD.
People are hypnotised with Facebook, YouTube, Wikipedia, Twitter and Myspace to get pleasure and overstaying on there are causing losses of core Taka. Our productivity at work is declining for over surfing the wall of facebook and checking out our favourite blogs.
As a birthday gift a Black Berry mobile phone was given to Sohail Arman whose father is a businessman, he preferred the phone for his beloved 17 years old son. The Independent communicated him, he mentioned his son every minute checks his online status, he does it even he is in dinning room and bathroom, everywhere he is carrying his phone with the internet connection. His father is concerned for watching his son is passing time at the study room with keeping eyes on the mobile phone.  
Internet with mobile phone is a tool for a busy businessman. If you often see your mobile phone without business communication, just involuntarily check messenger, facebook, twitter etc that indicate you should test the addiction level.
It has been reported that many offices blocked social networking sites for negligence of works of staffs who are preferring the sites more than doing office works. Before the social networking sites some employees inspired surfing the Net for gathering knowledge and keeping in touch with the colleagues, partners and clients.    
Facebook has panoramic features to find old friends, to attend social events, enjoying video clips, playing games and earning money with online marketing. Such social networking sites are reducing the alienation problems of the last century. New social orders are on the creation and new problems are concerning us. If you forget your daily life and be irresponsible to your profession means it is a matter of concern. Being in touch with online friends can black out friends from your real life.
Internet addictions are common among the students and teenagers, free Internet access, availability of internet can be a reason of inspiring the obsession. Much stayers on the net sometimes are suggested to visit psychologists for psychotherapy.
Even mature people are addicted to internet and facebook. Mahmud Hossain, a 31 year old man working in a government office, said- he has developed a immense patience to project his eyes on the monitor screen till 4 am, so hurriedly I am attending office at morning and again longing on the messenger. Without internet I feel my life is virtually paralysed.
Working at online is not always addiction to internet. For profession and for the benefits of yourself internet is essential. You can test yourself own obsession level if you hear you have an addiction to internet. If your mates, coworkers or family members have made comments that you are over using the net, so you should test whether you are addicted or not.
If you ever late in attending office, meeting and assignment for delaying sign out of internet that means you are addicted to internet web options. If you ever found yourself getting very uneasy not to get your a facebook friend on the list. Without emergency talk you spent hours to wait for the friend. It should be a matter of concern for you. Out of stress if you tease someone or sent cyber abusive words means you are not mentally sound and most of time staying on the peoples' personal information can distort your nature. Privacy breaking is a part of mental disorder if you are browsing personal information of other only for pleasure.
Curing internet addiction is a new field of psychology. Every day a big numbers of addicted person are been breeding in the cyberspace. Soon we will have remarkable cyber citizens and a big part of it will be obviously internet addicted that addiction should be cured by trained psychologists; sociologists should address the problem on time. In addition, before the cyber obsession havoc we should aware the netizens about the internet addiction.



Something Informative.So wanted to share .
Thanks Shabnam'

Monday, December 7, 2009

Love & Mercy: Permanent Fixtures of Marriage




Love & Mercy: Permanent Fixtures of Marriage|
Dr. Deema Tariq Tahboub|

(from www.Islamtoday.com)


If we take a cursory look at what is being said on television, the radio, in magazines, and on Internet forums about marriage in the past and present, we quickly see a trend. We can summarize this trend by repeating what our grandmothers keep telling us: "The blessing has been taken out of our lives."

There seems to be a consensus that married life was better in the past. It is obvious that we perceive we have problems today in our marriages that did not exist before. In spite of the fact that lives in the past were certainly harder and more rigorous, there was a degree of affection, closeness, and stability in their lives that we do not enjoy today. In spite of the advancements in our knowledge, our technology, and all the conveniences and luxuries that they bring us, it seems like we are less happy than our grandparents. Our social ties are much colder and more strained.

Modern life may be less harsh and grueling, but is more stressful. Moreover, our personal difficulties at home and with our careers are compounded by general economic woes and a world of political crises. Where do we vent our frustrations first? Who gets to bear the brunt of all of our stress? Our spouses, that's who. Oftentimes the spouse is given a share of the blame or accused of not being supportive enough.

And what happens in our busy, stressful lives when one spouse tries to bring love and affection – a little romance – back into the picture? What is often the response?

"Honey, we have no time for all of that. We aren't teenagers anymore. We're full-grown adults."

As if love and affection have an expiration date! As if once we get too old, once we have children and responsibilities, there is no longer any time for such things.

The Qur'ân puts the lie to this idea. Allah says: "And from among His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves to take comfort with, and He placed between you love and mercy." [Sûrah al-Rûm: 30]

This verse shows us the enduring nature of the love that should exist between the husband and wife. When it speaks about love, it is not talking about those fleeting passions like we see in the movies, but about something substantial, something that is supposed to be woven into the very fabric of married life.

Ibn `Abbâs provides the following commentary on this verse: "A man has love for his wife and the "mercy" is the mercy he feels for her f ever she should face any misfortune. This love and mercy is not some fleeting sentiment. Rather it is the wellspring of enduring tenderness, kindness, and a good relationship."

Therefore, our busy lives, our maturity, our children, and all those other excuses that have become commonplace today to justify an affectionless married life – those excuses carry no weight. It is as our scholars of the past have said: "Society will remain upon goodness as long as they do not seek excuses for themselves."

In spite of the fact that marital love is an established principle of our faith and of our Islamic culture, we have neglected to give it our attention. We are loath to explore its dimensions or to devote serious study to it. Now, instead, I the Muslim world we are debating the idea of "sex education" in our modern school curriculum. Sex education? Is this what we are supposed to be teaching children who have never yet learned how to show love? To boys who have no idea how to properly relate to women – starting with their own mothers and sisters, and then in the future with their wives ad children?

Love – the proper emotion – is a principle of our religion and culture, so much so that Allah has made it part of the completeness of our relationship with Him. "He shall love them and they shall love Him" [Sûrah al-Mâ'idah: 54] Allah could have said: "They shall reverence Him" or "They shall follow Him" or "They shall fear Him". Why did Allah choose "love" as the description for the rope that binds Him to His worshippers?

Scholars of the Qur'an explain: "The perfection of following the tenets of faith and engaging in good works is only realized on the basis of love. It is the means of attainment and of spiritual growth."

Learning about love starts at home. The first examples children have are those of their parents. Therefore, if we as husbands and wives live coldly with each other, without warmth and affection, what example of love are we giving our children? It is ironic that children are the excuse many parents give for not having the time for a loving and affectionate marital life.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) was most affectionate and tender towards his family and he exhorted his followers to be the same. During his farewell pilgrimage, in that famous last sermon, he addressed his followers saying: "I advise you to be good to your womenfolk. Only a noble man shows them honor and only a base man shows them contempt."

Knowledge comes from learning ad love from being loving. Whoever sews love in their marital lives shall reap love, and whoever sews gruffness and harshness in their marriages shall have a bitter harvest.


Allah Hafiz

Shabnam

Friday, September 25, 2009